bread of life
so blogger changed. if you read this and don't have a blog then that means nothing to you, but it was an interesting surprise for me tonight. it's probably part of while i will not be deleting my blog just yet (something i've been considering for a while). i mean come on, i just went through the strenuous two-minute process of upgrading this thing, you think i'll abandon it now?? on to the important things...
work, work, work. i tried, and i think succeeded, to stop talking about that place on here. but now, i must discuss at least a little. the past few weeks have been particularly difficult for me and i don't really know why. there was a brief period during which NOTHING at work bothered me and i was pretty worried about that fact. but now that things are bothering me, i'm almost wishing for my apathy back. my days have been filled with sexual abuse which is always a ball of happiness. then there have been several people, one in particular that yelled at me on friday, that have made me feel bad and frustrated and told me i'm killing their children. and finally there was the strangest case i've heard so far that involved rattlesnakes, children and meth - always an exciting combination.
so needless to say, when i sat down in church today i felt like i was about to burst. i was thinking about the things i hear and the fact that i could have been quite content in my life never even having imagined them. the things people do to each other, to their supposed loved ones, to defenseless chlidren, elderly and disabled people. i was feeling so disappointed in humanity and tears were welling up in my eyes. and then, i looked around. i looked at the smiling faces of old men hugging each other. i looked at the family in front of me with the disabled and always joyful son who recites every prayer so loudly. i looked at the fathers helping their tiny children into the pews. i looked at our devoted and loving priest. and just like that my faith in people was restored and a sense of peace came over me.
what i love about my church is that it is nothing glamorous. it isn't filled with wealthy or extraordinary-looking people. they are ordinary, often plain people from every imaginable walk of life. and we come together every week to celebrate a faith that tells us that there is hope for the people i hear about at work. a faith that teaches us that there is always hope that people can and will change. and a belief that God is with us every second of every day and that what i do at work follows His call for us to help the least among us. and that makes me happier than any job ever could.
work, work, work. i tried, and i think succeeded, to stop talking about that place on here. but now, i must discuss at least a little. the past few weeks have been particularly difficult for me and i don't really know why. there was a brief period during which NOTHING at work bothered me and i was pretty worried about that fact. but now that things are bothering me, i'm almost wishing for my apathy back. my days have been filled with sexual abuse which is always a ball of happiness. then there have been several people, one in particular that yelled at me on friday, that have made me feel bad and frustrated and told me i'm killing their children. and finally there was the strangest case i've heard so far that involved rattlesnakes, children and meth - always an exciting combination.
so needless to say, when i sat down in church today i felt like i was about to burst. i was thinking about the things i hear and the fact that i could have been quite content in my life never even having imagined them. the things people do to each other, to their supposed loved ones, to defenseless chlidren, elderly and disabled people. i was feeling so disappointed in humanity and tears were welling up in my eyes. and then, i looked around. i looked at the smiling faces of old men hugging each other. i looked at the family in front of me with the disabled and always joyful son who recites every prayer so loudly. i looked at the fathers helping their tiny children into the pews. i looked at our devoted and loving priest. and just like that my faith in people was restored and a sense of peace came over me.
what i love about my church is that it is nothing glamorous. it isn't filled with wealthy or extraordinary-looking people. they are ordinary, often plain people from every imaginable walk of life. and we come together every week to celebrate a faith that tells us that there is hope for the people i hear about at work. a faith that teaches us that there is always hope that people can and will change. and a belief that God is with us every second of every day and that what i do at work follows His call for us to help the least among us. and that makes me happier than any job ever could.
1 Comments:
oh jeez. well this entry almost made me tear up. i think you're amazing to do what you do.
as for your experiences at your church, i am so glad that you have found a faith that MEANS something to you, and that helps you with the rough times. hold on to it - you are so lucky to have found it.
buhbye pretty lady.
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Diane, at 1:25 PM
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