my life

i've been a terrible blogger lately. i've also been a terrible friend to many people i truly love. jen - you have no clue how much i adore you even if i suck at showing it. so a little catch up:

italy was fun. i will go back in the relative future to do many things i failed to do. although i hate long flights, i think i'd really like to see a large chunk of this world before i'm too old and bitter to appreciate it.

teaching is teaching. i have my good days and my bad days. there are a few kids who really brighten my day. example: my two little boys who have brought in their own copies of dante's inferno and are reading ahead at home. my passion for literature is absurdly lame and i'm overjoyed when someone else shares it. at the same time, injustices and apathy frustrate me beyond belief. some days this job is rather disheartening. often i hate the realities of this world and the direction in which so many of us are headed. it'd all be much easier if God had just equipped me with the ability to fix everyone else's problems. then i wouldn't worry and be upset so much. but, such is life.

i think i'm reaching one of those turning points in my life. certain things have come to light to me very recently (including realizations occurring as we speak). i'm feeling this deep desire to cleanse myself and my life of all the self-destructive patterns i create, to be rid of anything and everything that drags me down. i feel that some big decisions will be made in the next few months and i hope i'm strong enough to do what i know i should. geez, i'm absurd and melodramatic. i suppose someday someone will find those qualities endearing.

that's all for now. off to watch the little brother kick some ass in junior high basketball. a happy 15th birthday to him.